Thursday, September 30, 2010

And to your right, you'll see the Volcano Mom

I should be a volcano.

I roar like one. And I give some really good growling indications that I’m about to explode.

It would be a handy excuse because then I could blame my temper on my volcanic ways.

No such luck.

Now--it happens from time to time at my house--I’m like Pompei. About to explode with anger and let it bury my whole home in grey ashes of guilt.

But, quite honestly, that’s not who I want to be.

There’s no love in that.

And so, now, today I unveil to you...dunh,dun-na-nahhhhh!--


In general, I’m not an “angry” person. I don’t have a continual scowl. I’m not looking for a score to settle. I’m not out to hurt anyone....

I’m just like anyone else. Except that, when I am disrespected or stressed my anger builds like a volcano and then explodes with pyroclastic power that can decimate hearts and wound spirits.

Some people bury their anger. I let the whole world know about it.

But Proverbs reminds us that “Only a fool gives full vent to his anger.”

Huh. How about that?

Now, I’m angry and a fool.

Not something I want left on my tombstone.

What I love about Mediated Learning is how it intertwines with using scripture so well.

The biblical book of Ephesians tells us to put off the old man, the angry man...

How does one do that?

First, prayer.

Second, use the step called Self-regulation. Self-regulation is a big fancy-schmancy term for saying, “take a moment to choose the right thing.”

Self-regulation involves taking a deep breath and turning your heart in a new direction.

My moment of self-regulation looks like this:

“Jesus help (deep breath). I lay down my life and choose Yours. Amen.”


It doesn’t feel that way when you are seeing red and ready to yell and scream and stomp your feet. But making the choice to follow Christ is a simple choice, not always an easy one.

If you find your anger building and you are about to damage a relationship with your family or friend, take a step back. Try some of these statements:

*I feel I’m about to say something I’m going to regret. I’m going to leave this room and I’d like to talk about this when I’m not so hyped up about it.

*Let’s take a moment to calm down and talk about this later

*My favourite one: Strife break! Be back in five!

This past season in our life has been a bit stressful. And it’s brought to light how I react to stress. I get a bit angry and frustrated. We’re all human and we all have our triggers when stress arises.

Some of the Mediated questions I’ve asked myself regarding my anger is:


What is going to happen if I continue choosing to live in a state of anger?

What needs to happen in order to stop blowing up?

What else can I do to deal with stress?

Who is keeping you accountable in this area of your life?

I know that I cannot change myself. That is the work of the Cross and Grace in my life.

But my first step is one that requires falling on my face before my King and Saviour and saying, “Help. I need you.”

And through the strength He gives me, I’m able to gather my kids on my lap, with husband by my side and say, “Let’s pray for Mom today. I’m angry and frustrated and I don’t want to be. I don’t want to yell or lose my cool. I’m sorry. Please forgive for the times Mommy has blown it.”

We pray.

I cry, not caring if I look weak or not.

And I fix my mind on the Truth that I know: “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.”

CF focus: Behaviour

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